There are so many terms, opinions, and suggestions on how to live and love. All over I see posts, videos, and more about how to love ourselves and also how to be in love or handle our relationships with others. It can be confusing, self-destructing, and not the full path to true love and embodiment.

What if I told you there is only one path to focus on and immerse in? That this way of being leads you to the deep love that you have been searching and longing for? And what if that way let you release fear (ego) and be taken over by love?

Love is the center of your being. It is the love of the Divine (or any name, being, or thought that you prefer) source moving and living through you. When you embody this deep, divine connection and move through life from this source, it means that love can never be depleted, lost, or taken away. It also helps you connect to others in way you never thought possible.

This love is holy. It is the whisper in the darkness telling you to "hold on, I've got you." It's also the intuition you feel when something feels wrong or right and the moment of pause to encourage you to live from your heart and take the leap through fear.

When you take moments to surrender and listen deep within your heart, you realize that love is everywhere. And it's also shining brightly through you!

Love is guiding you to sit in the dark, walk through the flames, and connect you deeper to yourself in ways you never thought possible.

This knowing and peace connects you to the Divine. It's a very personal connection that you have with the supreme love. It's the most real and important relationship that you will have in your life. Everything you do, experience, and connect with stems from this deep love.

Are you ready to connect with the never-ending source of love?

Practice: Place your hands on your heart, breath in deep continuously, and take a quiet few minutes to explore and get curious. Tune in and listen to what your divine intuition is telling you when the ego is out of the way. Write down or draw what you see or hear.

This practice and path of love takes time, patience, and discernment of learning what is based in fear and what is actually coming through from a place of love. Remember the ego likes to protect you!

And if you have lose your way, come back and remember that...

"If you take one step towards love, love takes a million steps towards you." - Sean Johnson

Learn more about this path by getting my FREE Embodiment Video!
https://mailchi.mp/0420966d79f6/embodimentfreevideo

Patience....

It's a word that I have heard from others a lot lately. For me, being patient after this past year of big changes is one of the hardest things to hear. I want it all to happen now!

Have you been struggling with being patient on your current journey? 

Patience and time can be our best friend, but it can also be our worst enemy when we are ready for what is to come next. This year of COVID tested our patience and the struggle to keep going can be real.

We've been asked to be bigger than ourselves and care for others even if it takes away our patience. I know for me, I am ready for stuff to happen right now and feel like just as we being to move, we are paused again. The ability to stay on the path of love and wait for it to come in time is not something I want.

But when it comes to healing old patterns, physical issues, traumas, and learning to care more for ourselves and others, patience is all we have. We have to stay in the moments of struggle to fully release what needs to be healed in our body, mind, and spirit.

It's time to release the doubt and control and learn to accept/surrender to the process. We can create the dream or want the dream, but have to break free of the struggles that are keeping us from getting there.

For me, I have to release what I feel I do wrong in situations and trust myself to know that I am enough. The dreams will come in time, the body will release when ready, and the heart will be fully open again to others.

Is it time for you to bring more patience into your life?

I love providing spiritual practices to others and being a guide. Reach out to me at swaninthelotus@gmail.com to book a FREE Discovery Session!

Wellness is becoming a popular topic and there are so many things you can do to stay healthy.

But one area of your body seems to be missing in the wellness world, especially for women.

And that area is the pelvic floor! 

The pelvic floor connects your lower body (hips, low back, butt, etc.) and it is made up of three layers with thirteen different muscles. Its job is to be flexible and strong so you can move freely along with routine daily functions.

Daily functions include sitting, walking, squatting, and most importantly, secretion of toxins through pee and poop.

Women have the added element of hormonal health, menstruation, possibility of child baring, and more.

If you don't pay attention to your pelvic floor, it can lead to issues and conditions down the road. This means the bladder can be overactive, little bits of pee or poop can come out at the worst time, constipation, IBS or digestion issues in the lower intestines, organs falling down, and other stressful daily functions.

So how do you prevent or keep this space happy and healthy?

Being aware of this space and its function is key in recognizing your overall health.

Noticing how many times you go to the bathroom, cramping during or around your period, lumps in breasts, tightness of your jaw (linked to your pelvic tightness!), stomach digestion, color of pee and poop, ease of going to the bathroom, pain in the lower body including hips, low back  and pelvis, and various other daily activities are signals of weakness or tightness.

Once you become aware of your daily function, you can start to look at wellness ways to alter your routine or find exercises to help this area. You might even need to seek a Pelvic Floor Physical Therapist or advance support with a coach.

The pelvic floor is a powerhouse and holds so much weight. It carries physical, mental, and emotional pain/stress which can be built up over the years. Be kind to it, explore it, and show it the love that is deserves! 

Now that you are a little more aware of the pelvic floor, are you ready to start your wellness journey to better overall health?

Focusing on this area changed my life and my body, mind, and spirit benefited greatly when I started to make daily changes to keep it strong, flexible, and functioning.

Now is the perfect time to start your own journey!


Learn more about my Women's Embodiment Program and preview offer below.

Or book a FREE Discovery Call with me today!

This is what pelvic floor therapy can look like. Crazy, right? 

The journey to healing pelvic floor issues for women is a long process and isn't easy. And overcoming them overnight is a fairytale. I wish it was a dream come true to wake up and instantly everything would be better. The truth is that we need to work through it to get to the other side.

The struggle is real and having to use all these tools has been a reality for me on my journey. The pain can be daily and depending on where I am in the process, the therapy would help it or make it worse.

For many years, I was consistent with my therapy. I made it part of my routine, motivated with or without my physical therapist, and confident in how my body was feeling. I was able to have relationships with men that included sex, wear tampons without pain, and not have phantom pains from the nerves in my pelvic floor. Everything was going smoothly and then my long-term relationship ended.

The healing on all fronts caused me to stop being consistent and retreat back into my old pattern of ignoring that I had an issue. I felt at points that coming pack to therapy was pointless because I wasn't having sex anymore or in a relationship. I'd also tell myself lies that I was better so why do I need to go back to therapy?

This was a two-year process of escaping and pushing it off for another day. Then COVID hit and my world changed. I had to adjust to a new life of being home more, laid off from my job, and working hard on my business. I started looking at my self care and one of the practices that I was lacking in was healing my pelvic floor. I now had no excuse for me not to connect deep to myself, work through all that has been thrown at me, and do the work. It took several months to get adjusted to this new life.

The shift happened for me to go back to therapy when I was working on who I was serving with my wellness and yoga offerings. For a long time, I didn't feel worthy and I held too much shame to help women through their own therapy process. As I started to rebuild myself and noticed who I was already helping, it was clear my calling was for me to help other women through their journeys.

This realization gave me the strength to come back to my therapy. It was painful, frustrating, disheartening, and the wave of feeling like something was wrong with me came back. Each time I came back and felt pain, I'd breathe and remind myself that I am still further than before and I got through this once so I can do it again. My muscles are starting to respond again and the release of them comes a little more each time.  

I noticed this time around that I don't need to be motivated by anyone else but myself. I have been learning stories of other women, reading even more books, being a part of Facebook groups, and remembering my experience is for me to help others. I also found that I was afraid of intimacy with myself and learning that I am worthy to have pleasure with myself.  It is a taboo topic that no one wants to share, but it is important for women to know that they can be sexual. That we can feel empowered and share our stories without societies judgement. It's taken me a long time to share my story and journey, but now I am on a mission to continue to share it with the world and be the support that I needed but couldn't find.

Stay tuned for my new program coming in 2021!

​Blog Proofreader: Sheila Novara, Word Polish Proofreading (www.wordpolishproofreading.com/)

​I identify as a cisgender woman and my programs for women's health come from my identity and knowledge. My pronouns are she/her/hers.

To tell your story, especially a story that is linked to shame, is never easy to tell. It was only a few years ago that I was finally able to share my story with other women. By doing this, I learned that I wasn’t alone and there are so many others that feel shame and misunderstood when it comes to women’s health.

So, here is my story or my journey to learning my medical condition, finding help, learning my body, and finally sharing my knowledge with other women.

When I hit puberty, I was at the young age of 10 years old. I had developed early so it wasn’t a surprise that I got my period at a young age.  I had just learned about our periods and sanitary items to use right before I got it and already had knowledge from my mom and older sister. During this time, I found out that using tampons was extremely painful for me and it felt like a shooting pain was running through my whole body. I learned that it was an issue in my family, but I didn’t feel like mine was an easy fix.

For years I dealt with this issue. Mostly, I hid from it. I was only going so far in relationships with men since sex was completely out of the question for me. I felt lost, broken and my sexual energy was suppressed.

It wouldn’t be until my early 20s when I found a lump in my breast that I would finally get some answers. Doctors were never concerned about a pap since I never had sex but as I got older, it became more of a pressure to get one. I figured it was time to see an OBGYN to discuss the issue further.

During this time, I saw a well-respected doctor, and the first step was an ultrasound to make sure nothing was “officially” wrong. I remember making the appointment, going into the room and the nurse wanted to stick the wand camera into my vaginal opening. I told her again why I was there so I ended up having to sit in the lobby and drink water until my bladder was full. Just another embarrassment to add to the list!

I met with the doctor and found out that I had band of extra hymeneal tissue. I later came to know that it’s called Septate Hymen and the extra band of tissue runs vertically in the area of the normal hymen. Some people can have sexual intercourse and it easily breaks. I had a more extreme form so it was like a moon shape. This means it would take more to break it.  The process would either be through the dilation method or to have surgery. My first thought was surgery since it would be an in and out procedure and wouldn’t take long to heal, but there could be scar tissue. The scar tissue could cause issues down the road. I decided to go with dilation and ordered a set of dilators during the time I was looking for a job with limited insurance coverage. Perfect time to buy them, right?

Well, let’s say the dilators sat in my closet for almost seven years. They seemed way too big and gave me more anxiety about the whole issue. I told myself that someday I’ll have sex, it will be painful for a while, and someday it will be better.

Jump forward to several years later when my doctor moved and I needed to find a new one. After a recommendation, I went to an OBYGN and she was the answer to my prayers. She took the time to sit with me and discuss my issues. She informed me there are pelvic floor therapists who help women with this condition and guide them through the dilation process.

She gave me a referral to a therapist and I had an appointment soon after. I can’t praise my pelvic floor therapist enough. She guided me through the process and I would look forward to my appointments. I found myself working through the pain but also found support along the way to move forward in a positive way.

Of course I had set backs but she was there to guide me, support me, and encourage me through the year-long process. Finally, one day, the breakthrough came. My hymen broke and I was able to use the larger dilator along with vibrational therapy. Through this process, I also learned how to strengthen my pelvic floor and I even taught my therapist yoga techniques that also helped me. In the end, we both learned from each other.

At the end of the long process to recovery, I found myself connecting to what I call my "sacred space". I finally started to work through the shame and share my story with other women. I found that I am not alone and the therapy I did along with yoga was asked about by a lot of women. I learned a lot about menopause and other pelvic conditions through this journey and started to teach my Women’s Health Workshops.

I came from a place of shame, hurt and hating my body to loving myself, learning my limits and that my story needs to be shared. I also found that my IBS was controlled a little more because I had less pressure on my pelvic floor.

I wish I could say in the end that I am completely healed but sex is still uncomfortable. But for me, the fact that I can use tampons without any issues and not have extreme pain is a win for now. I remind myself that this is my journey and only mine to share. That I was given this issue to help women discover their bodies and be a guide to show that you can heal your own body on your own terms and time. You might not be ready now but someday the right people will come along and you will feel the need to take care of yourself, that your life will change, and things will heal and get better if you work at them.

Looking for more information healing your pelvic floor? Check out my current workshop offering or book a FREE 30-minute discovery session with me today! 

Life can be overwhelming and on top of the daily to-do lists, needs of others, and demand on our schedules, we have no idea what we are thinking about the majority of the time. We have more thoughts than our brain knows what to do with or for it to know what to attach to. Sometimes it seems that the thoughts we have are a never-ending repeat of the same thing.

So what drives us to make the decisions we make, the thoughts we have, and have a continuous thought loop?

The underlying part of our habits and thought patterns is our subconscious mind. This part of our mind holds imprints and memories and creates "truths" that it looks to recreate in the present. These may not be actual truths, but true to us since we continue to experience them over and over again. The subconscious mind serves up the truth and our behavior follows suit, creating a pattern that repeats itself.  When this happens, we find that we keep getting the same experience. Every action we take seems to mirror back to us the same belief. This is the process of the Feedback Loop. The Feedback Loop is there to keep our old beliefs in place. Our subconscious mind desires to keep the old beliefs in place because they seem comfortable and to move from them is to step into unknown territory.

We actually have the innate tendency to create patterns and events over and over again in order to match subconscious beliefs. We sabotage things, make excuses, or make it seem like we can never get anything right. This causes us to lose hope in our goals or desires. Even when we have the goal or dream in mind, our Feedback Loop continues to show us that it's not possible. We get frustrated and don't get the result we want.

In order to change our patterns, we have to first identify where our beliefs actually stem from and examine what patterns are occurring in our present life as a result of this belief.

This first step is a hard one to take make on our own since it is breaking away from our comfort zone. We have to move through our original wounding, deep shadows of thought, and rooted emotions to break through and find our truth.

I call this process "Upgrade Your Mindset" because we are really working to reboot how are mind works and give it the latest thought practices to be able to live a more awakened life. 

So, if you are ready to learn more about this process or the next step, book your FREE 30 minute Discovery Session today!

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Photo by: ​SHAENA RAGNA PHOTOGRAPHY

Imagine this wellness wheel is a pie that you bought and it's filled with everything you love. You've fixated on buying it for weeks and are debating if you should share it with anyone or keep it to yourself. You can't wait to take a piece of it and even eat more than one piece. But you know the guilt of eating too much will come after you have finished.

This is true about how we feel about our wellness and self-care. There are so many options to choose from and we feel if everything we love is in the pie then we will feel fulfilled and happy. And maybe we find that one piece leads to another and we end up feeling guilty for indulging too much or are hungry for a different pie.

The truth is that not all wellness is good for us and not all self-care tools are ingredients that we need to have a fulfilling pie. We have to take a look at ourselves, find the imbalances, and start to move one piece at a time. We have to slowly make our way through this first piece and reflect on how we feel before we can fully move on to the next piece. 

The wellness wheel above allows us to do this. It gives us the opportunity to look at all parts of our life and see where we need to take the first step. There has to be balance between indulging in ourselves and learning to know when we are full.

It helps us enjoy our piece, but also learn that it is okay to share with others. We have to take our piece, work through it, and be able to freely be happy to share the rest with others. What we see in the wellness or self-care industry doesn't paint this picture. Yes, we have to fulfill our needs first, but it leaves out the piece about sharing with others. That we only need to take what we need and not make it solely about what is happening with us. 

When we truly use this wheel and work through the unhappy hard stuff, then we can fully give to those around us. That is the goal of true balance and finding our little bit of  'piece' in the world.

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Imagine your body is a suit of armor. It is built to protect you and keep you safe from external elements. It also makes sure that everything stays tightly wrapped up inside of it. But over time the armor breaks down, losses strength after each battle, and slowly we need to repair it.

Our body is built to keep us protected, safe, and healthy. Over time, our body begins to feel the wear and tear from internal and external elements. Situations, both physical and mental, start to bring about uncomfortable pain, which turns into chronic pain over time.

There are so many ways that can we relieve physical pain including: medicine, hydration, herbs, ointments, movement, etc. We try everything that we can, but we may still feel the pain deep in our muscles and a heaviness in our soul.

We are made of energy and it moves through our breath (prana), circulation, and nervous system. When our energy is low and we are dealing with high amounts of trauma, stress, and other challenges, our body can feel the lack of flow. This lack of energy is signaling to us that the body, mind, and soul are out of balance. Understanding this connection allows us to start to move into the energy body and learn more about what our pain is telling us. 

A combination of physical pain relief methods and discovering the deeper connection to our pain from a mental standpoint will provide the relief that we are seeking. To start the process of understanding your pain, start by asking yourself some simple questions (see below). From these questions, you can start to determine what you are holding on to and why there is a lack of energy in this space. Avoidance of emotions and thoughts stay in the body. It's important to take time to release them and move one step further in whole body pain relief.

Questions to ask yourself:

What is my challenge with body pain?

What have I tried that hasn't worked in the past?

What am I willing to do to relieve this pain?

Where is my pain located the most? Is it in my heart, lungs, low back, hips, or somewhere else?

What happens when I start to breathe into this area? Do any thoughts or emotions come up?

If emotions or thoughts come up, sit with those emotions for 90 seconds and really feel what is being held there. From there, start to become aware of any stories that come up and exhale to release the energy out your body.

Next step, continue to learn pain relief tips and other wellness support with me by signing up for my email newsletter.
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We are collectively and personally going through hard times and it seems like a never-ending cycle. It might seem like it's coming out of nowhere, but the ancient texts and scriptures in the yoga/hindu practice knew these times would come to us. They created hymns, mantra, and more to help guide us through. The Age of Technology has brought us closer together, but also has divided us even farther apart. The key to moving through these hard times is connecting to mindfulness, self-inquiry, community, and other practices that are in this ancient system. 

So what ancient practice will help me on this journey?

To remember how we started in this world, we have to go back to the start of creation. Creation is always happening and there is no end of time and nothing is completely destroyed forever. The knowledge or wisdom of this is called Veda. 

The Vedas scriptures are divinely inspired and were heard (shruti) by ancient sages. They are made up of the Rig (oldest and most authentic) Veda, Sama (melodies and chants) Veda, Yajur (mantras used for rituals) Veda, and Atharva (procedures for everyday life) Veda.

Each veda provides the knowledge to create spi(ritual) practices to guide us through the cycle of creation and remind us to turn to its many forms (air, fire, sun, etc.) to live a balanced life. The chants, mantras, and hymns are part of the Nirguna Bhakti. This form of bhakti (devotional practice) is the devotion to the formless divine.

By turning to the vedas, we come back to the main teachings of the yoga/hindu tradition, which is  knowledge (jnana), devotion (bhakti), and karma (action). These three elements provide us a guide to navigate through hard times. It is a reminder of the divine within us and to live how Neem Karoli Baba said, "Love everyone, feed everyone, and remember God."

During times of grief, struggle, and stress, the ego wants us to control and make it all about us. The truth is that we are never alone and we are always in divine play (lila). Creation, destruction, and transformation is constantly flowing to guide us to the next part of our journey. The key is to tap into this ancient practice to continue to love, accept, and surrender in the continuous cycle of life.


The Mangalam Chant:
       -naming and blessing each and every part of creation 
       -mangala - auspicious, lucky, and fortunate
       -Bhavatu - very well, okay, and amen

Bhumi-Mangalam,  Udaka-Mangalam,  Agni-Mangalam, Vayu-Mangalam,  Gagana-Mangalam,  Surya-Mangalam, Chandra-Mangalam,  Jagat-Mangalam,  Jiva-Mangalam, Deha-Mangalam,  Mano-Mangalam, Atma-Mangalam, Sarva-Mangalam-Bhavatu-Bhavatu-Bhavtu

May there be peace in earth, water, fire, and air, the sun, moon, and planets, in all living beings, in body, mind, and soul. May that peace be everywhere and in everyone.

One of my favorite recordings of this chant is "All Good" by Girish.

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We were all born awakened beings, but it's the path back to our true nature that can be hard to navigate and understand. 

It's a challenge to go back to our awakened self because we aren't taught how to understand our emotions or thoughts. We either let them consume us or not even deal with them at all. In most societies, we teach math, science, reading, and more, but basic understanding of our daily thoughts and the emotions that go with them are not covered. This leads to years of built up emotions and thought patterns in our subconscious. Because of this, it becomes harder to go back to the true, loving being.

The path to awakening is not easy, but anyone can do it with support, knowledge, and understanding. We have to be willing to do the work, dive in, and accept what might be built up over the years. For me, my journey towards my true nature has had many setbacks and many nights of painful tears. My thoughts and emotions would consume me and I would have no idea what to do with them. Then I learned how to look at the world through love. This process took me on journey to discover my voice of love (holy spirit) and not allow the fear to disconnect me from my awakening path. 

Now, I feel the opposite. I love deeply to those who are deserving of my love and continue to send love to those who are on a different path. I've learned the process of non-attachment and understand that I need to love myself to truly love others. Sometimes it can feel numb, but it's not the numbness that we think of. It's a sense of peace and knowing that love will show me the way. That I have a choice to love and care for others daily. I also have learned my boundaries and can fully give instead of allowing others thoughts or emotions to determine my mood or worth. 

So are you ready to take the journey to your own re-awakening?

What fears are holding you back from discovering the truth?

Where can you find support to start this journey?

Continue to explore and take time to guide yourself to this new way of experiencing life!


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